back to work

well i'm back to work again.
There's a felling of guilty with my mom. I screw up her dreams. I have made my decission, she also did. I try to be fair to each other, not only to her but also to him.
It's not a relax condition on my vacation. can't feel the comfort also on both part.
arggghhh...I only need her understanding and stand on my back for everything that i take. I miss the time when i can tell everything to my mom, tell the story bout the things with my boyfriend, my job, my friend. But now, it's not the same anymore. It seems that there's something on my throat.